Decision made, Tears Dried

Friday, September 24, 2010

I made the decision to put my baby through much higher doses of radiation for both her femurs and possibly stunt her growth permanently. It hurts so badly, just imagining what I am putting my own flesn and blood thr, but I will take whatever consequences and side effects just as long as she beats cancer and is alive. The thought of giving up has dried up like the tears, no longer there. The reality is getting tougher with each single day and the journey will be nothing that I've ever experienced, am sure that I will be beaten a couple more times. I will cry, I will think of giving up and I will be devastated more than a million times, but I will get up, dry my tears and do whatever it takes to survive.

Cyn mommy


2amYH said...

Sometimes we have to make painful decision. But think about it, who else can think and feel as much the mummy on what is the best for their child? God blessed!

stacey said...

They are people who not just heal their cancer, but live till old age despite doctors told them they only have months to live. Don't think of cancer as terminal illness, it never is. Otherwise, no one will recover from it. Get the latest book by Dr. Bernie Siegel called Faith, Hope and Healing. You will find many examples why people healed despite they are not supposed to. It's called the survivor behavior. Survey shows that children have higher survival rate compares to adults. Chemo or radiation is not necessary bad. Not all people have serious side effect unless they don’t trust the treatment can bring benefits to them. Healing is not just about medicine, you need to look at psychology/emotional factor too. God bless.

Susan said...

Yes, make the decision, dry the tears, and just move forward and don't look back.
Whatever decision you make for precious Charmaine, know that we, your blog readers, (the majority of us I am sure), stand by your decisions, and are walking the journey with you, in spirit.
God bless and be with you all,

Alvin Zhang said...

Heh Cynthia,

Hang in there, I am sure things will get better. The light is at the end of the tunnel.

Please do not give up.

Watch this video for strength whenever you feel that there is no hope:

Warm regards to your family,


Mama Joan said...

Jia You! Charmaine and Cyn

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