The many miracles behind Charmaine’s passing

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

by Godma Jolene on Monday, 24 October 2011 at 23:20


On Sunday evening, clad in Charmaine's favourite colours of yellow, pink and green, we set off balloons of the same colours flying up into the sky. We sent Charmaine off with smiles amidst tears. We told her to fly... like a fairy.

She had always wanted to be one.

Somehow, the balloons all flew towards the sun and a friend told us it was a sign from Charmaine to tell us that she is fine. We were in tears but we felt a sense of peace knowing that Charmaine is in a better place now.

The logical side of me actually wondered about why balloons float towards the sun but a search on Google warrants no results. I must say that the spiritual side of me is telling me that it’s really a sign and that not everything could be explained by science.


Charmaine’s miraculous smile

For people I know who visited Charmaine at her wake or rather Celebration of Life party as what Cyn mommy termed it, I made it a point to tell them the story behind Charmaine’s phenomenon smile when she passed on. The New Paper (Saturday, 22 October 2011) did not have a report on her smile. Only the Chinese newspaper Shin Min Daily News ( 新明日报) on the same day had a little section on it but since they wrote Cynthia’s Chinese name wrongly in that little section, some people read that portion with some doubt and actually asked me if the reporter was exaggerating.

Ever since Charmaine was brought home from the ICU to say goodbye (Monday, 3 October 2011), new tumours had been popping up everywhere on her little body. The cancer was spreading at an alarming rate but yet, she still fought on in immense pain. By then, she was rendered almost immobile. Her body was degenerating by the days but still, she continued her battle in spirits.

The last tumour popped up on Thursday (20 October 2011) in Charmaine’s mouth on the inside of her cheek. It was raw and bleeding nonstop till her whole mouth was full of blood. With her little lung failing and her mouth full of blood, she could not even close her mouth.

On this very same day, Cyn mommy for the first time was begging the heavens to take Charmaine away for she did not want her to suffer anymore. She hoped for Charmaine to be free and be the happy girl she had always been.

As if knowing that cyn mommy was finally ready for her to go and only upon the arrival of her beloved gong gong, po po, ku ku and godma, Charmaine slowly left us with cyn mommy hugging her and sobbing. All this while, Jase kor kor was lying face down on the bed, holding onto Charmaine and wailing for his char char to come back. He slowly cried himself to sleep while still holding onto Charmaine.

Much to my sorrow, Charmaine’s mouth was still opened when she passed on. To put it very graphically, her mouth was like a little O-shape. I wetted some gauze while cyn mommy used them to clean the blood inside her mouth. Cyn continued hugging her and talking to her in a soothing voice. Well knowing that she’s gone, some of us family and friends alike continued stroking and talking to her too, saying lots of positive words and at times even joking amidst tears.

About an hour later, a good friend of ours told us that Charmaine seemed to be smiling. True enough, she was indeed smiling! Her mouth seemed to have relaxed and the little O-shape actually transformed into her usual toothy grin while her lips slowly pursed into a smile! It was AMAZING to have actually witnessed such a phenomenon with my own eyes!

Could this be explained by science? I guess so but I prefer to think of her smile in the abstract way.

I really have no idea how it happened but I must say that I’ve actually witnessed many miracles in Charmaine’s short life story.


The last miracle

Today, Cyn mommy went to collect Charmaine’s ashes and to her utter delight, three relics were found in Charmaine’s ashes! Being a Christian, the first time I ever heard about relics in ashes was when my hubby’s paternal grandma passed away. She was such a good person and if I remember correctly, she had a few relics! According to Chinese Buddhism, saints or very highly practiced monks may have them. Special people or people with very good karma (basically a very good heart) may have them too. For Charmaine to have 3 in her little body is truly amazing.

Charmaine is really a special girl and I’m not bragging about it just because I'm her Godma. I could go on about Charmaine’s legacy that she has left behind and how Charmaine is such a courageous, loving and thoughtful little girl even right up to her final moments but I would probably leave that for another day.

26 comments:

BenziT said...

Glad to know that the heavens has Char in safe hands.

Xueyi said...

R.I.P., feisty princess charmaine.. You will be well-loved and remembered. I hope you are happy now..

mamabumperbee said...

once again, i was brought to tears by reading this.. she is indeed an angel sent from above. i cant believe a 6yrs old can taught me so much about life. Life is precious and she had fought it to the end. To me, she is a winner and a warrior and i will remember her for a long long time...
Like you, i would like to believe its a sign from Char that she is fine now. i really miss her.

mamabumperbee said...

once again, i was brought to tears by reading this.. she is indeed an angel sent from above. i cant believe a 6yrs old can taught me so much about life. Life is precious and she had fought it to the end. To me, she is a winner and a warrior and i will remember her for a long long time...
Like you, i would like to believe its a sign from Char that she is fine now. i really miss her.

mamabumperbee said...

once again, i was brought to tears by reading this.. she is indeed an angel sent from above. i cant believe a 6yrs old can taught me so much about life. Life is precious and she had fought it to the end. To me, she is a winner and a warrior and i will remember her for a long long time...
Like you, i would like to believe its a sign from Char that she is fine now. i really miss her.

claire said...

God bless each and every one of you for sharing charaine's journey with us :)

jasmine lek said...

Thanks for your update, Char's Godma. I am really amazed and proud of this little girl and also her mummy. My tears flow every time i read the blog. So happy that Char left with a smile. A sweet, brave little girl and she's free now, watching over her mummy and brother. She will always be remenbered and loved by everyone. Take good care of yourself, Mom Cyn and Jase. Pray that life would be good for you and your family.

Stephanie said...

You may go goggle to search for '6 big big big angles' about this 4.5 yrs old girl many visits to heaven. From there, you will know Charmaine is there too.

For all young kids still have God nature in them. They do go back there by default!

Mommy of 2 said...

Cyn mommy & Char, you've both fought a good fight! You're so courageous!

diana

Asher Seah Z-I & Ayden Seah Z-We said...

Dearest Cyn Mummy,

We may be total starngers in this world but i think you have been a great, courageous and self-less mum! I salute you and I think efforts these years for little Char are so commendable. Little Char has been brave too. As a mum myself, I cannot imagine all these you have had to go through. Rest assured, Little Char has gone on to a better place, relieved of pain.

best wishes and take care!

Vivienne said...

thanks for sharing, Jolene, it brought tears, tears of both happiness and sadness to me.

Charmaine was indeed an extraordinary little girl and I will always remember her and tell her story.

Cyn mommy said...

Hi Declan Isaac,

I don't know how to address you since you did not leave a name so I shall address you by your nickname. I've modified this post to include a link on relics. It is very informative but written in Chinese unfortunately. The link was provided by one of our readers on Facebook. English websites do not explain much about relics in the religious way.

http://baike.baidu.com/view/153.htm

- Jolene

2amYH said...

Thank you for your sharing, it brings comfort to those who has been following your blog. Thank you.

秀坊间 said...

Little Angel Charmaine... To me, you are just like a little angel from above to teach us how to treasure life no matter how short our life will be...

Mommy, remember how brave your Charmaine had fought thru all these for the past 2 years, she never give up... so you must do the same and pull yourself up... just remember her smile and you will be able to make it...

lison lim said...

Hi Jolene,

You are an angel sent by God to help and love Charmaine's family...

Thanks for sharing with us the happiness and sadness of Char's journey.

Well wishes and take care.

♡Krissy♡ said...

My 5yo daughter send her little love to charmaine. :) http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150344075362043&set=o.53217919641

♡Krissy♡ said...

my 5yo daughter send her rainbow to charmaine. :) http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150344075362043&set=o.53217919641

anny said...

Hey Cynthia, I have made the 3 watches for you!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/14311139@N00/6281617633/
Remember to send me your mailing address.
Love,Anny

Declan Isaac said...

Hi Jolene,
Thanks for the link.

Irene :)

anny said...

In case you forget, either SMS to Veronica or email me at annyho@singnet.com.sg

stacey said...

The day Char passed away. It was my birthday. In the eternal creation of life and death, we all are going to die someday. We can’t stop life changing its form because it is the law of the universe. In the end, life is not about winning or losing a fight. Because death can’t separate the love we hold so dearly in our hearts. Char's life inspires the invisible quality of love and courage. When we pass that force of love to other fellow humans, Char’s spirit continues to live and progress in this physical world. Love is stronger than death.

Bingz said...

Hi mummy cyn, it's been a long and tough fight for your family. i do pray that there's someone there to tell you it's ok to grieve, to mourn over charmaine's departure. we do not have to be strong all the time. humans are built in such a way that there are periods of fatigue and weakness. there's a time to grieve, and there's a time to move on. it's a process which every human going through loss has to experience. i wish that jase is a motivation for you to move on, and to give to jase the love which was meant for charmaine. i believe that after years of being the 'elder brother', jase wants to feel loved and be given the 100% attention from a mother as well.

we didn't experience what you went through. all we could do is empathize, and using our imagination to feel what you are feeling now. but i do pray that you would find an inner strength in you to move on, to put charmaine in your hearts. to smile when you think about her, to be reminded of only the happy moments she has brought to you and jase.

Mama Joan said...

Why 3 relics?? Perhaps it symbolise mommy cyn, kor kor jase n lil' char.. I guess it means u trio will always be bonded together as a family n she will always b wif u, living in ur heart..

Justina said...

I very much agree with you Mama Joan!! :)
This was what popped up in my mind when I read this post...
I somehow could see our lil warrior running around freely and happily up there with her new friends and at the same time watching over Mummy Cyn, Kor Kor Jase and her loved ones.

Mystery Prince said...

Charmaine is indeed a strong person.Although I am older
than her (to be honest)I am
not that brave.God bless you,
Charmaine!

Mystery Prince said...

Charmaine is indeed a strong and
brave girl!We should really learn
from her!Although I am older than her,to be honest,I am not as strong as you!Your story really
inspired me to be srong like you!
Thanks,Charmaine

 
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